By Marc Gafni
From my book, The Mystery of Love:
Love is all about insight–in-sight. It is the ability to see in, to the inside of the inside, to the Holy of Holies that is your lover. Eros is being on the inside. Thus, love is an erotic perception of the highest order. Naturally you have to move way beyond sexual seeing. Sex only models eros. To be an erotic lover you have to understand that “what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
When something is far from you, you have to open your eyes really wide to see it. As it gets closer you squint your eyes, when it gets really really close, you close your eyes. Seeing with closed eyes is when we perceive way beyond seeing. The adjective close and the verb close are the same word. Closeness–intimacy–higher vision–all happen when we close our eyes. We move beyond sight and invite the other faculties of perception to guide us. Smell, sound, touch, and taste all become alive in a deeper way when we close our eyes.